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Everything You Need to Know Before Buying a Vibrator
If you haven't been formally introduced to the wonderful world of — then, welcome, hello, the sex toy world is happy to meet you. If you're scared of buying your first vibrator, then be not afraid! Here's what you should know to before you buy.
Do You Want to Shop In-Store or Online?
One perk of buying a vibrator in a store? You can get literal, actual pro tips, in real life with real human beings.
"The people that work there [at sex shops] are so well-informed," says We-Vibe Global Passion Ambassador Tristan Weedmark, noting that "they're more than willing to answer and it can really help take some of the uncertainty out of the equation." There's literally no reason to be embarrassed talking about sex in front of these folks: they aretalking about pleasure for their jobs.This is not your church's bridge club.
But, OK, let's say you're shy about your sex life (which is fine!), youdon'twant to have a conversation with a human being about sticking fun things inside of you, and you'd rather do your research at home. The best part of buying toys online? Nobody needs to know, and you can do it all in the comfort of your sweatpants with a box of pizza on your lap. Vibrators and pizza, the ultimate combo.
There are also stores that can provide you with a discrete, more private and personal feelingandthe in-person expertise you might crave. "I recommend my clients go to Eve's Garden in [New York City]," says sex therapist Sari Cooper, since it'sinan office building — it's quiet, she says, not loud and wild.
Anotherway to get the best of both worlds, should you not be want to seen scurrying down the street with a massive vibrator box: Check them out in stores and order them online.
Figure Out What Kind of Sensation Want to Feel
Do you like clitoral stimulation or do you like a G-spot O? Most women orgasm by clit stimulation, but the only way to find out whatyoulike is to make like Vasco da Gama and explore. What sensations do you like? Whatdon'tyou like? Then find the vibrator that specializes in that kind of feeling. Or, go nuts and get one that gives you double the stimulation (like a rabbit-style vibrator or the Nova). There are also couple's vibrators, should you want to share the fun with your partner.
If it's your first vibrator, you might want to start light. "I would work your way up in terms of sensation," Cooper says. That's not to say that heavy sensations are bad! "I think there's this idea that's you can dull your nerve endings if you use a toy too often, but that's not really true. You certainly could start feeling a little numb, but it's not permanent." She also recommends getting a toy that has different sensations.
Decide What Kind of Material You Want
Silicone is a pretty commonly used material, since it's non-toxic and super easy to clean. Only catch? Don't use silicone lube on it or it will cause the materials to break down.
Weedmark advises women to be mindful of more porous vibrators since bacteria can get trapped really easily in there, which, uh, can suck (as in, possible infections). There are also steel and glass vibrators, which are safe, but they tend to be more expensive.
And Weedmark is emphatic about safety.
"Unfortunately the sex toy industry is unregulated [so] there can be a lot of toxic materials in the lower end products," she says, pointing specifically to jelly material vibrators which have phthalates, which can be toxic. "I know the price point's attractive, but our body safety and our body health are important." She says that vibrators made out of ABS plastic are often good choices, since they aren't made with latex or BPAs.
It's also important to decide if you'll get a vibrator that's submergible — if it's water-proof, it will be easier to clean, and, again, sex toy hygiene is *super* important.
Set Your Budget
The price tags on some sex toys candefinitelybe scary for a first-timer. A lot of high-end vibrators run upwards of 0 and well into the 0 territory, the financial equivalent of a pair of shoes. But remember where you're putting that vibrator! Your lady parts (and your sex life) deserve only the very best (within your price range — please don't put your house up for sale to invest in sex toys).
"The price tag can be sometimes intimidating," Weedmark concedes, but, she says to consider it "investing in your sex life and your sexual pleasure."
Just remember that some vibrators might be cheaper for a multitude of reasons: the material might be cheaper (and as mentioned previously, they might possibly have toxic materials), or it might be battery-operated as opposed to rechargeable, which Weedmark says might cost you less up front and more in the long run (especially if you use ita lot!). More expensive options might have a technological component, like an app, in which your partner can control the sensations while you're away — something that is awesome for people in long-distance relationships.
Go forth and have fun!
"[Recognize] that you're not alone and a lot of people are buying vibrators and people at the store will give you the right information to take care of you and steer you in the right direction," Weedmark says. "It might end up being really fun event rather than a daunting one."
And once you go home? Even more fun awaits!
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